The Hairy Bank

anjewoodruffe member for 33 weeks 2 days Send a message

I have been trying to figure out for a while why it is my b/f does not like me to go bald ‘down yonder’. His comment to me one time was “you don’t need to grow a forest but a trimmed lawn is nice.”

There have been many arguments in support and rebuttal of the hairy bank, so much that even on Sex in the City, Samantha confessed that she did not shave Lil Sam because her beau, Smith Jarrod liked a “full bush”. For thousands of years, pubic hair on a man or woman was an aphrodisiac to the opposite sex and it also did a good job of hiding the (sssh) ‘privates’ from being exposed. However, on a hot summer day, there is nothing more psychotic than looking down below and thinking – wow, if I got some lil beads, I can braid my hair down there. Sooooooo not cute! I used to want to keep my pubes the way I like it but if the man who is doing it and doing it and doing it well to me doesn’t like it, it can have detrimental effects on my hump sessions. So what do I do? I’m no fool and I don’t try to convince him otherwise either.

Some men say that shaving takes away the sexy look of the female and the stubble is annoying and uncomfortable while some argue that the porn star look is more visually appealing and it can make their member look better and they can see more [this might affect men with smaller penises more because I haven’t heard Mandingo Man complain about his inability to see anything related to his penis in my vagina in the last 3 years].

Some men say that women are doing it because it’s popular and that we think it’s what they want, when they really don’t. Others venture to say that they like the clean machine so they don’t need to floss between tongue waxing. Also with health concerns and STD’s spreading like butter on warm toast, a cleaner look can allow you to see what you’re DOING. Literally.
Lights on please.

There are women say they have increased sensation during sex with it commando while other women report the opposite when intertwined with the bush beater. Personally, I prefer a low fade and I don’t think I need to be concerned about the pedophile boogeyman with my b/f.

While I do not represent for the vaginal department of forestry, I can say that while I believe in preservation, and conservation does mean wise use, I don’t mind cutting down some branches to see clearly into the horizon. And as much as it kills me to say this, and it is one of the few times when I can say it and not gag, “its all about you baby. However you like it is fine with me”.

P.S. If you add a few drops of wet naturals to the hairy bank, the slip and slide factor increases Laughing out loud
P.S.S Thank you feathermaye for the inspiration to write this blog.

Comments

Login or register to post a comment

lol, you guys are just too

lol, you guys are just too funny...

I have shaved once and hated it. I have always been extremely proud of my beautiful bush. There's something about it that I find ferocious, in a little sexy sort of way. When I shaved it off, I literally yelled, "omg! it's a naked mole rat!!!" Because that's exactly what it looked like. I actually put off going to the gynecologist until it grew back, I was so ashamed of her seeing my naked mole rat.

So I like it wild and free, but I do trim every once in a while so nothing unexpectedly pokes out from beneath my underwear/swimsuit. I figure hey, it's there for a reason. Great post!Smiling

"Be the change you wish to see in the world." - Gandhi
http://vevadreamsgreen.wordpress.com/
http://greenveva.webs.com/
http://www.thegreenhoneybee.com

C-Section

After my second c-section when I really paid attention to the process I was like whoa this is cool. So I bought one of those electric razors/clippers men use to shave their beard (I guess) and I have been clean cut ever since. My husband never complains.

Then after to moving to GA, they don't call it HOT-Atlanta for nothing. I can't deal with the sweaty feeling. This cool razor/clippers is battery operated and you never have to worry about those pains from the hair growing back....no complaints here.

Nicole E. Porter
Surprise Honey!
http://www.surprisehoney.com
Eskinde's Accounting & Tax, LLC
http://www.eskindesacctgandtax.com

My vagina monologue

I am a hairy person in general. My arms, that sexy part of your lower back Yea! never been sexy for me because I have hair there. And please don't try to wax it because I'll break out! welcome to my world.

So when I was old enough to show off my 'bank' lol I knew I wanted that shaved for the love of God! So I kept a neatly trimmed triangle since I was about 17. Regardless of what my s/o said. Now I'm still that same way. I currently need a little waxage now, but hey I'm mnarried! But for the most part I have a bald fade down there in a shape of a triangle.

Men on the other hand, I've felt too long hairs before but clearly the sex was boring which is why I was focusing on his extra long pubs...Either way I heard about men getting bikini waxes....um I think it's rather gay.

I personally feel cleaner, less irritation and would never srtop shaving regardless...reminds me I should go now!

You and cheryl crack me up!

You and cheryl crack me up! Now when the word triangle comes to mind I'll think "j2parks" lol

I like a man who keeps the hairy nuts nice and trim but not BALD - please! I am sorry but an erect penis sticking out between two hanging nuts with no hair is probably the funniest thing I could imagine!

xoxo Anje
"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best" Eye-wink
Marilyn Monroe

Well....

You know, I call it as I see it. I'm glad I can turn your frowns upside down!

xoxo Anje
"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best" Eye-wink
Marilyn Monroe

I love my razor...

Somehow this conversation comes up a lot. I actually was having it with my friend and my friend/bartender at dinner. But I love my razor. I use it EVERYDAY. My boyfriend could be in another country and I am still shaving. It looks and feels better for me. I have yet to meet a man who likes hairy girls. I am sure they exist I just haven't met them....

that's weird I was just looking into getting a Brazilian ..

that's weird I was just looking into getting a Brazilian for the first time today and I came across this post. Sorry for the late comment but I have been busy with other things.
I have shaved (completely) for the last 2 years or so which makes me feel clean for the most part and I like the look of it up till a few weeks ago when I decided to take some sexy pics for my s/o and realised that it didn't look so nice. Now I want a nicely trimmed "lawn" but don't really know how to go about it myself - anyone got any good tips? What about a stencil? I'm sure I must have found a gap in the market here? Bush stencils - sounds like a brilliant idea - in fact let me do a quick google on this... hold on...bet it's been done a million times before, yep after a quick look it has.

I have however found a very amusing story about waxing which has made me giggle..here its is.....enjoy..

LOL Story: Another Wild Waxing

All hair removal methods have tricked us with their promises of easy, painless removal - The epilady, razors, Nair and now...the wax.

My night began as any other normal weekday night. Come home fix dinner, played with the kids. I then had the thought that would ring painfully in my mind for the next few hours: Maybe I should pull the wax out of the medicine cabinet.

So I headed to the site of my demise; the bathroom. It was one of those cold wax kits. No melting a clump of hot wax, you just rub the strips together in your hand and then they get warm and you peel them apart press it to your leg (or wherever else) and hair comes right off. No muss, no fuss. How hard can it be? I mean I'm no girly, girl but I am mechanically inclined enough that I can figure it out. *YA THINK!!!*

So I pull one of the thin strips out. Its two strips facing each other stuck together. Instead of rubbing them together, I get out the hair dryer and heat it to 1000 degrees.

Cold wax my rear end (Oh how this phrase haunts me!)

I lay the strip across my thigh. Hold the skin around it tight and pull.

OK so it wasn't the best feeling, but it wasn't too bad. I can do this! Hair removal no longer eludes me! I am She-ra, fighter of all wayward body hair and smooth skin extraordinaire.

With my next wax strip I move north.

After checking on the kids I sneak back into the bathroom, for the ultimate hair fighting championship. I drop my panties and place one foot on the toilet. Using the same procedure I apply the was strip across the right side of bikini line, covering the right half of my vagina and stretching down to the inside of my butt cheek (Yes, it was a long strip) I inhale deeply and brace myself. RRRRIIIPPP!!!!

I'm blind!!! Blinded from pain!!!!....OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!

Vision returning, I notice that I've only managed to pull off half of the strip. S&%T!!! Another deep breath and RRIIPP.

Everything is swirly and spotted. Do I hear crashing drums??? OK, back to normal. I want to see my trophy - A wax covered strip with my hairy pelt, that has caused me so much pain, sticking to it. I want to revel in the glory that is my triumph over body hair. I hold up the strip!

There's no hair on it.

Where is the hair. WHERE IS THE WAX??? Slowly I ease my head down, foot still perched on the toilet.. I see the hair..The hair that should be on the strip. I touch. I am touching wax. S&%T I run my fingers over the most sensitive part of my body, which is now covered in cold wax and matted hair.

Then I make the next BIG mistake.................remember my foot is still propped up on the toilet. I know I need to do something. So I put my foot down. DAMN!!!!!!!! I hear the slamming of the cell door. Vagina? Sealed shut. Butt?? Sealed shut. I penguin walk around the bathroom trying to figure out what to do and think to myself "Please don't let me get the urge to poop. My head may pop off.

" Hot water!! Hot water melts wax!! I'll run the hottest water I can stand into the bathtub, get in, immerse the wax covered bits and the wax should melt and I can gently wipe it off right??? *WRONG!!!!!!!*I get in the tub - the water is slightly hotter than then that used to torture prisoners of war or sterilize surgical equipment - I sit. Now, the only thing worse that having your nether businesses glued together is having them glued together and then glued to the bottom of the tub. In scalding hot water. Which, by the way, doesn't melt cold wax.

So, now I'm stuck to the bottom of the tub!! God bless the man that convinced me I should have a phone in the bathroom!!!!! I call my friend thinking surely she's waxed before and has some secret of how to get me undone.

It's a very good conversation starter "So, my butt and who-ha are stuck to the bottom of the tub!". There is a slight pause. She doesn't have a secret trick but does try to hide the laughter from me. She wants to know exactly where the wax is located on bottom "Are we talking cheeks or hole or what?" She's laughing out loud by now...I can hear her. I give her the rundown and she suggests I call the number on the side of the box. YEAH!!!!! Right!! I should be the joke of someone else's night.

While we go through various solutions. I resort to scraping the wax off with a razor. Nothing feels better then to have your girlie goodies covered in hot wax, glued shut, stuck to the tub in super hot water and then dry shaving the sticky wax off!! By now the brain is not working, dignity has taken a major hike and I slip into glazed donut land. My friend is still talking with me and my hand reaches towards the saving grace....the lotion they give you to remove the excess wax. What do I really have to lose at this point. I rub some on and OH MY GOD!!!!!!! The scream probably woke the kids, scared the dickens out of my friend, but I really don't care. "IT WORKS!! It works!! I get a hearty congratulation from my friend and she hangs up. I successfully remove the remainder of the wax and then notice to my grief and despair..................................

THE HAIR IS STILL THERE.......................ALL OF IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. So I shaved it off. Heck, I'm numb at this point.
Next week I'm going to try hair color......

Just wondering!

How is Bozo the bush? lol

Did hair color prove more rewarding than hair removal?

xoxo Anje
"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best" Eye-wink
Marilyn Monroe

I have never shaved it all

None of my boyfriends (at least as far as I know) has wanted it shaved. I even remember one telling me he was releaved the first time he saw me naked, because to him a total shave was a complete turn-off, because it made him feel like he was doing it with a girl who hadn't hit puberty...

I often trim it, especially during summer, but I don't think I would shave it even if a future boyfriend asked me to.

Like Flo rida I can get low

Like Flo rida I can get low low low but never bald!

Hair's to us!

lol

Sorry - I actually just cracked myself up saying that

xoxo Anje
"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best" Eye-wink
Marilyn Monroe

:D

lol

This was a great post. What

This was a great post. What a great way to open dialogue on such a hot topic.

Love the stories that followed. Very funny!!

Great Post!
XOXO,
Freda
Founder
www.AlphaWomen.com
"Those Who Say It Can't Be Done Need To Get Out Of The Way Of Those Who Are Doing It!"

Just Say No! lol

I've been bush free for about a year now. I happened to go to a spa that had a 1/2 off your 2nd service special that day and opted to get a Brazilian as my 2nd service. It was the most stereotypical experience: big German lady with no remorse for the sensitivity and tenderness of my skin down there. The agony! It felt like my skin had been ripped off my body, but I loved how it looked. My bf at the time liked it too, so I kept it up. I decided I would Nair it instead and have been doing that ever since. It seems to work out for me just fine. Now I can't stand for any hair to be down there. It freaks me out when I start to see the stubble growing in. lol

Gwen Jimmere
www.theduckwalk.com
Just because you can take a punch doesn't mean you have to stand in front of a fist